Waiting here for You

If you wait at wisdom’s doorway, longing to hear a word for every day, joy will break forth within you as you listen for what I’ll say.

For the fountain of life pours into you every time that you find me, and this is the secret of growing in the delight and the favor of the Lord.

Proverbs 8:34‭-‬35 TPT
https://bible.com/bible/1849/pro.8.34-35.TPT

What a beautiful and fresh version of the verse.

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WHO YOU SAY I AM

I fell in love with this song when I watched several Hillsong church services on Youtube, and been obsessing with this service’s rendition:

Next to Brooke Fraser, I love this worship leader and everytime I listen, I hear a beautiful voice that brings me into loving worship of my wonderful God.

Get my hygge on

On our recent trip to Bangkok, I saw a book at Kinokuniya (while Immanuel had the time of his life browsing through countless books, and buying a few) which talked about the Danish notion of happiness.

The author, Meik Wiking, who is the CEO of The Happiness Research Institute wrote in his Litte Book of Hygge, about the concept of hygge (pronounce hoo-ga), something that some Danes think is uniquely Danish. While I’m not too concerned about whether it is unique or not, I sure want it.

He describes it as a ‘hug’, somewhat ‘intimacy’, which is generally ‘cosy’. Quite an abstract concept that many of us feel in various settings. Fireplaces and candles are the epitome of an experience that’s hyggelig. 

As we build our home in this season of our lives, Immanuel and I seek to keep our home like Kanra (Japanese minimalist), but with loads of hyggelig nooks for books and snuggles.

The Power of Introverts

As I write this, I’m listening to Susan Cain’s Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking. It’s an insightful read (or listen) on how introverts can and should be valued. It strokes my ego in ways that could be totally factual. I’ve always wondered why I prefer to ‘shy away’ from crowds and prefer not to make small talk, even though I have learnt to do so.

I love people, yet hate them. I don’t like isolation but like being alone sometimes. Doing my own business at home hasn’t been entirely easy. I look forward to my scheduled social gatherings with my close friends, like never before. I make sure I don’t go overboard and yak non-stop when Immanuel comes home from work.

I’m still listening and it’s still good but does get dry at times. Introverts or extroverts – everyone is woven intricately and differently.

But one fun fact that I got was that Pixar’s campus is really cool and seems to satisfy both personality types.

Rainbow colours everywhere

I went down to a centre for a volunteer interview today. After how the previous interview panned out, this went very smooth. While I know it’s for a volunteer position, I don’t take it lightly.

I’m looking forward to have some mornings occupied with meaningful activities – the way I designed my life to be.

Though I told the coordinator that I’d want to commit for 3 months for now, if this suits my new rhythm for the year, I’d gladly extend the stint.

Side note: a little walk in the market near the centre landed me a suitable toolbox for the flowers.

Whatever.

I’ve been getting a lot of ‘whatever’s in my farewell notes.

‘All the best in whatever you do’ is the pretty standard one from those who don’t quite know why I left. But I can’t blame them since I’m not exactly crystal clear on that either.

It’s so comforting that in Psalm 1:3, God says that as I am like a tree planted by the rivers, I bring forth fruit in its season, my leaves shall not wither, and that whatever I do shall prosper. This verse just got even more real for me. So, so comforting.

Listen

Hear the voices of the non-words.

I had an interesting conversation with Immanuel on our last day in Bangkok and I’m thankful to be able to engage in such spoken words with him.

My mind always ventures into arenas that my hands don’t dare to go. Sitting at Roast on our last day of the trip, I observed our surroundings:

  • Local staff working at a hipster joint
  • Blonde lady with her very adorable blonde baby
  • Thai couple with their equally cute baby
  • Fellow Singaporeans just like me, taking photos of their stylish brunch dishes
  • Thai lady with impeccable English with her Singaporean friend, talking about work matters and life
  • Japanese ladies with a little child
  • Thai lady eating alone

Many other patrons there, but these are just some specific ones.

It’s easy to dismiss them as just fellow patrons of Roast, there for a good meal. But we all have our stories. Some to tell, some to alter, and some to survive.

In my short life on this side of heaven, I’ve had my fair share of ups and downs, but I would call myself extremely blessed. Many others live lives far tougher than I can imagine and far more horrific than I can empathise.

I admitted, quite sadly to Imm that I find it difficult to empathise with the lives of the food sellers, motorbike taxi drivers and masseuses in the land. I try to define each profession because there’s something belittling about generalising a people as the typical person from a place.

Would the young lady stall owner at Soi 38 dream of a life bigger than her stall? Would she want to travel the world? Is she even from Bangkok? Or what did she have to leave behind to come here to prepare food for others?

Do the bike taxi drivers hope to put on better shoes than the Onitsukas that we saw a group of friends admiring as we walked through the streets to get to brunch? Are they married? Do they have children and what do they hope for their children to have?

Do the ladies helped by Alingon, mentioned by Erwin McManus in The Last Arrow want to see a better future for their daughters? Or have they resigned to the route of prostitution? Every time foreign hands touch them, do they still shiver in fear and cringe in disgust? Or have they grown numb to the abuses?

Immanuel comfortingly put that perhaps empathy can be done without necessarily understanding someone else’s shoes. Perhaps empathy can be simply admitting that – there’s no way I can understand what you have been through.

I know I was made for more than this, all my comforts, my blessed life, my good days – but my hands feel so small. Where can I overflow to?