Dreams

Practiced my Courtesy Script again after watching Beauty and the Beast as I ate my breakfast.

I absolutely love this. Beauty and the beast, Cinderella, Aladdin, The Little Mermaid, are really Disney Classics that I can never get tired of. They’re just full of hope and dreams.

The word ‘Dream’ has been appearing so many times.

Been wanting to jot down snippets of my dreams for fear that I may lose them soon. I used to have plenty. Ambitions, goals, dreams – whatever you call them.

I started Hope Alethia with the hope of having a sustainable business which married my interest in creation and design and having the money to help and support causes for women and children. However, it could not be sustained as I simply ran out of money. And probably, the interest too. And lacked the resilience to sort out all the administrative processes that had to be in place for a successful business. I still have stock scattered in my room reminding me of how it just died, but also reminding me that I once had the drive to pursue what I wanted – as a varsity student no less. Not many did that. While I would classify that as one of the things I failed at, I still have the hope that the brand would make its comeback as my many interests still have not died.

I am still supporting two children in Zambia and Ethiopia, and I do support A21 from time to time. So in that sense, I do have to remind myself that the dream has not completely died. It’s just… I don’t have the right resources right now to be the ‘starter’ of an organisation that does these.

Right now where I am, I am appreciating the financial stability which allows me to continue supporting the causes I feel for. And while it may seem really tough and meaningless at times, it really does give me money. Not as much as others, but more than many others.

I appreciate it.

I’m still slogging away on nights and weekends – though a teacher’s ‘seen’ work is only in the office, and still am having trouble reconciling how often I have to do and worry over things that are, really, people-problems that aren’t necessarily for the good of the students in the long-run.

But right this moment I actually have spare time to do up that piece of handlettering, and type this blogpost. And for that I am thankful.

I want to dream again and I want these dreams to stay in my head and in my heart. It’s scary to have had them and now no longer be able to see them.

But God, You are faithful and You set my heart ablaze, again.

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